The Pests

Things I am glad to be leaving:

While I can sum it up just by saying 'this whole place,' let me elaborate: The pests. 
I know, I know... there's a barn and there are fields here, so you are bound to see Jerry the mouse in the winter.  But here, it's Jerry et all.  All his cousins, I swear.  It's almost like they are rabbits!  My extreme hate for these creepy creatures has even broadened since I pretty much broke my finger trying to set the traps.  A purple bump the size of a 10 karat ring is not the most glamorous accessory.  I think I walked sideways for a few days from the weight of the 'ring'.

And then there's Tom the Cat.   He came with the place.  You would think Tom would have a hay day in the winter with Jerry et all, but no.  It's apparent he does try to eat his catch since he likes to puke them up on the sidewalk.  Maybe he's a vegetarian in disguise, and he just can't hold the prize.  I don't know.  At any rate, he should be fired. What can I say, it's Tennessee.  It's a right to work state. 
 
Moving on to the spiders in the sunroom.  These are the size of small children.  I'm just glad they don't talk back.  I'd fire them, too, but quite frankly, I'm petrified of their retaliation.

This is not Tom, nor is it my home, but if Tom were allowed in our home current residence, this is what he would say:

So winter leaves and then the dry summer comes, and we have to fight the ants.  What do they have, radar??  I'm not sure, but I think there was talk of an Ants II being filmed here.

Oh, and speaking of pests, there are the neighbors.  So weird.  I have no idea why they dislike us so much, but that feeling towards us is just as obvious as the discovery of Tom being a vegetarian.  "That awkward moment when...."  Yeah, our interactions are full of those.  I think he mows the lawn every other day.  We mow every other month.  They love that, I'm sure.  I keep expecting to see him out on his hands and knees with scissors and a ruler measuring and hand cutting each blade of grass.  I totally wanted to stick about 30 pink flamingo's in their yard and wrap their trees in Christmas lights this April Fool's, but couldn't quite pull it off.  I'll come back and try harder next year.

Happy Trails, my friends: Tom, Jerry, spiders, ants, and neighbors.

*Disclaimer: this has been a slight exageration regarding the quantity of each pest!  Just fun to write about...   :)   OH! Except for Tom... there really is a Tom the Vegetarian Cat.  And I'm sure the people moving in are going to be so excited when they see his little prizes.